Single On Valentine’s Day: Taboo or the New Norm?

When you think of the words “Valentine’s Day,” the first things that come to mind are probably heart-shaped boxes filled with chocolates, pink balloons and a candlelit dinner.

If you’re in a relationship, that is.

The rest of the population just mocks the holiday for being pointless and waits for the candy hearts to be half off at their local drugstore so that they can pick up a few boxes.

Thanks to the massive amount of advertising that goes into commercializing the holiday, it doesn’t come as a great surprise that many teenagers feel pressured to be in a relationship when February 14th rolls around. A quick survey of their friends though would reveal that they’re probably not in the minority when it comes to flying solo this Valentine’s Day. "A lot of my friends are unattached at the moment," says Brittany, a first-year student at Mount Royal University in Calgary. "There used to be a lot of couples around, but now it seems as if everyone is either breaking up or choosing to be single."

Most people would think that the lovey-dovey atmosphere, courtesy of the cutesy stuffed toys and cheesy music that fills the malls, would increase the number of doting couples in the new year in anticipation of Valentine’s Day. Instead, the percentage actually drops drastically during December and January – the later commonly referred to as National Break Up Month by numerous magazines and relationship experts.

So what causes this abrupt increase in broken hearts just before Valentine’s Day?

When I polled 30 high school students on the matter, nine in 10 insisted that they would not hang onto a problematic relationship in order to avoid being alone during the holidays. For January brings about not only a new year but new views and opinions as well; people begin to think of Valentine’s Day not as an excuse to go out to dinner and buy gifts, but instead as a day to reevaluate their relationship and what they want in a boyfriend or girlfriend.

"People's priorities are changing," says Taylor, a 17-year-old high-school student at St. Mary's High School in Calgary. "Especially at this time of the year. There are diplomas, university applications…. The last thing on people's minds is whether or not they'll have someone to spend Valentine's Day with. Why would they bother trying to make a difficult relationship work when it would only add unnecessary stress?"

The chocolate-coated holiday is also largely ignored by the unattached population. "There's not much of a point in celebrating it," says Olivia, a grade 12 high-school student from Calgary. "It's only useful if you're dating someone. Otherwise, there's really nothing special about it."

Olivia's fellow grade 12 student Laura agrees. "You can't celebrate it; it's not an actual holiday. Chocolates, flowers… That's it. There's nothing to celebrate!"

Valentine’s Day has always been geared at couples, but nowadays it seems there are less and less people to target. Though what is often forgotten is that underneath the layers of taffeta and heart-print wrapping paper, it is a holiday that is meant to celebrate love in all forms, not solely romantic relationships. Instead of stressing about being unattached, people should spend the day with their friends or family, or thinking over what it is that they truly want out of a significant other.

And even if they still find the holiday frustrating, it is recommended that they try to suppress the urge to chuck musical teddy bears across Hallmark. It’ll save them the grief. And a visit with mall security.